Written by | Posted November 19, 2013 – 4:46 pm Deconstruction

Bad things are happening in Stormwind – and beyond.

The Hand of Lothar, they call themselves.

Yva Darrows was their first target.

Tirith and Aely were their second and third.

They have since… expanded their reach and escalated their methods …

filed under Healing, Other stuff, Priest, Silly
I won’t survive…
comment 7 Written by on March 8, 2008 – 12:30 pm

(To the tune of Gloria Gaynor’s “I Will Survive”)

At first I was dazed,
Then I was Mortal Striked,
Kept thinking I would always live
If I could duck and hide
But they’ve made so many mods
For Arathi and Warsong
They grew strong
I was their target all along

And so they’re back
They start to chase
I try to run but they break fear
Before I even melt a face
I should have played a stupid ‘lock
I should have stuck to PvE
If I had known it takes two seconds
To kill a Priest in PvP

You say “Now go,
Go cry some more”
I’ll just respec now
I won’t be healing anymore
Weren’t you the one who said
Priests were in short supply
You think I’m humble
You think I’ll do more than die?

Oh no, not I
I won’t survive
As long as they can break my fear
I know I won’t stay alive
I don’t have snares, or stuns or root
So I might as well drop loot
I can’t survive
I won’t survive

I used all the spells I had
But they still kicked my ass
I find it hard to believe
That we’re a “broken” class
And they’ve made oh so many mods
To keep a target on myself
I used to die
Now I reroll instead of cry

And you see me
Somebody new
I’m not that stupid Holy Priest that should be healing you
And so you felt like queueing up
And you spam raid chat with “heal plz”
But I’d rather do my healing
As a Shaman or Pally

You say “Now go, go cry some more”
I’ll just reroll now
You won’t get healing anymore
Weren’t you the one who said
Priests were in short supply
You think I’m humble
You think I’ll do more than die?

Oh no, not I
I won’t survive
As long as they use Mortal Strike
I know I won’t stay alive
I can’t wear shields or mail
And my Power Words won’t scale
I won’t survive

Oh no, not I
I won’t survive
As long as they can stunlock me
I know I won’t stay alive
I’ve got no shapeshifts and no plate
But long GHeals, Can’t you wait
I can’t survive
I won’t survive

(And no, I didn’t write this, but I fail at crediting the person who did – I found this a few years ago on the warcraft forums, and didn’t write down the author. Can you tell I’ve been PVPing? Also props to Big Bear Butt for his Wreath of Fire and for Bellweather’s Feralicious spoofs, which gave me many laughs and inspired me to go digging for this song.)

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7 Responses to “I won’t survive…”

  1. I was so singing along to that! very funny!

  2. This was really a treat. Thanks for sharing!

  3. Anna,

    Pull WWII from my facebook and post it here … I always love reading it again!

    By Niyati on Mar 8, 2008 | Reply

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